25 of the funniest street and place names in Surrey

Walking Bottom, Peaslake (c) Stefan Czapski, Geograph

Walking Bottom, Peaslake (c) Stefan Czapski, Geograph - Credit: Archant

On social media we asked Surrey Life’s followers and readers to name our county’s funniest, rudest, crudest and most bizarre place names. We weren’t disappointed and your fantastic responses have been compiled into this list

1) Jeffries Passage, Guildford

We could make many a joke about the comings and goings at this small alley in the centre of town but we'll refrain. Chris Warner, via Facebook, said that while he was working for the council he radioed into the police saying a suspicious looking chap had "just disappeared up Jeffries Passage".

Porridge Pot Alley

2) Porridge Pot Alley, Guildford

This alley near the river allegedly got its name in the 14th century when a man assaulted a woman with a porridge pot at that very spot.

where I used to play

3) Cock Lane, Fetcham

The name of this road next to Fetcham FC isn't the only humorous element of this entry. Back in 2016 giant penises were drawn on the road's potholes by the 'Cock Lane Crusader' and in the same year a semi at 69 Cock Lane went up on the market. You can't make this stuff up.


4) Pussey's Copse, Normandy

Most Read

This small, unusually-named patch of woodland makes up part of the countryside surrounding Normandy, a village between Guildford and Aldershot.

5) Willey Green

Just down the road from Normandy is Willey Green - we think someone was having a bit of a laugh in this part of the county.

6) Swallowcock Alley, Guildford

Information on this path off Walnut Tree Close and by the River Wey is hard to come by on the internet. We'd not recommend searching for it online yourself as it produces some rather unsavoury and unrelated results.

7) Lady Garden Cottage, Catteshall

This enviable property used to be a beerhouse called the Rose and Crown.

Walking Bottom .. ..

8) Walking Bottom, Peaslake

Set in the heart of the Surrey Hills, this road is an ideal spot from where to explore the area. It would also make for a very mild insult when you're next in a disagreement.


9) The Gaylord Restaurant, Weybridge

After the giggles are out of your system you'll enjoy some delicious Indian food from this eaterie on Queens Road.

10) Graham Gardens, Surbiton

If someone was trying to name this cul-de-sac after Graeme Garden - the comedian known for being a member of The Goodies - then they got their spelling a little wrong. After searching we can't find any places in Surrey named after Bill Oddie and Tim Brooke-Taylor.

Effingham sign

11) Effingham

Incredibly close to the sort of thing you say involuntarily after stubbing your toe or standing on a plug.


12) Dorking

John Hughes, via Facebook, says: "Dorking sounds like a criminal offence to me." Who knows what the punishment for Dorking late at night would be…

13) Christmas Pie Avenue, Flexford

Head down Glaziers Lane from Normandy and you'll find this wonderfully festive location.

14) Beaver Close, Richmond

Home to Hampton & Richmond Borough FC, you can bet that away teams dread a midweek trip to Beaver Close.

15) Ballsdown, Chiddingfold

It must be an absolute delight to put this down as your address on various pieces of correspondence.


16) The various Cockshots

Including Cockshot Wood, Hill, Road, Farm and Cottage, there are more Cockshots in Surrey than you can shake a stick at.

17) Jackass Lane, Godstone

This small country road takes you through some rolling Surrey countryside and so is worth a small jolly on top of the chance to see the sign with this silly name.

18) Irons Bottom near Reigate

That's one way to get the wrinkles and creases out of your rear end.

Titsey place

19) Titsey

Be sure to visit Titsey Place when you go to this village near Oxted.

The Flash - Ash Vale - Basingstoke Canal...

20) Great Bottom Flash, Basingstoke Canal

This area of water is not only a way of praising a well-executed mooney but also a lovely fishing spot.

21) Quality Street, Merstham

Interestingly this street lies next to Milk Tray Lane - if only that were true.

31 Dec 2010 Greensand Way

22) Shag Brook

This small body of water near Buckland runs through the countryside before eventually feeding into the River Mole.

23) Willey Broom Lane, Chaldon

Not the suggested way to use the male appendage.

24) Gimcrack Hill, Leatherhead

Some words produce a giggle despite not necessarily having any sort of funny meaning - Gimcrack is precisely one of those words.

25) White Knobs Way, Caterham

This crude classic rounds off our list and leads you down to White Knobs Park.


Follow Surrey Life on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram